Normen en waarden in English
The Dutch theme name uses three words. Each one means something different.
- Waarden (values) are what a society finds important, such as freedom, equality and respect.
- Normen (norms) are unwritten rules for how people behave. Nobody fines you for breaking a norm.
- Omgangsvormen (manners) are the everyday forms of contact, such as how you greet someone.
A wet (law) is different. It is written down, it applies to everyone, and breaking it can lead to a fine or a punishment. KNM asks about all four: what is usual, what is valued, and what the law says.
Everyday Dutch customs
Dutch culture differs by region, generation and workplace, so these are general patterns, not rules.
- Directness. Many Dutch people say plainly what they think, also to a manager. It is usually about the matter, not about you, and it is not meant as rude.
- Appointments. Afspraak is afspraak: an agreement is an agreement. People expect you to be on time. If you will be late, send a message before the agreed time.
- Planning. Many people plan social visits in their agenda (diary), sometimes weeks ahead.
- Birthdays. At a Dutch birthday you congratulate the person, and often their family too: Gefeliciteerd met je moeder!
- Introductions. When you meet someone, you often shake hands and say your name.
Our guide to Dutch social norms covers these customs in more detail.
Core values in the Netherlands
The most important Dutch values are written in the Grondwet (Constitution).
- Equality. Article 1 says that everyone in the Netherlands must be treated equally in equal cases. Discrimination is not allowed, for example on religion, belief, race, sex, disability or sexual orientation.
- Freedom of religion. You may follow any religion, or none. You may also leave your religion.
- Freedom of expression. You may say and write what you think. Discrimination and threats are not allowed.
- Self-determination. Adults decide for themselves about their own life.
Equal rights for women and men
Women and men have the same rights in the Netherlands. A woman decides for herself about her education, her work, her money and her partner. Women and men may do the same jobs, and an employer must give them equal pay for equal work.
Nobody may be forced to marry. Forcing someone into a marriage is a crime. Both partners must be at least 18 years old to marry in the Netherlands.
LHBTI rights
LHBTI is the Dutch version of LGBTI: lesbisch, homoseksueel, biseksueel, transgender and intersekse. In the Netherlands people are free to love who they want.
- On 1 April 2001 the Netherlands became the first country in the world where two people of the same sex could marry.
- Same-sex couples have the same civil marriage, with the same rights.
- Since 2023, Article 1 of the Grondwet names sexual orientation as a ground on which discrimination is not allowed.
More in our guide to LHBTI rights in the Netherlands.
The law comes before religion or culture
If you live in the Netherlands, you may follow your own faith and traditions. But when a religious or cultural rule conflicts with Dutch law, the law comes first. Two examples:
- A religious wedding may only take place after the civil wedding at the gemeente. Only the civil marriage counts in law.
- A family custom cannot set aside the minimum age of 18 for marriage, or the right of a woman to choose her own partner.
How the KNM exam asks about Dutch values and norms
The KNM exam has 40 questions, each with a picture and three options. You pass with at least 28 correct answers. Since July 2025 the questions ask what is usual or what the rule is in the Netherlands. They do not ask for your opinion, or what you personally would do. Here are three practice-style examples.
Mogen vrouwen in Nederland hetzelfde werk doen als mannen?
- A. Ja, dat mogen ze
- B. Alleen als hun man het goed vindt
- C. Nee, dat mag niet
May women in the Netherlands do the same work as men? The answer is A: yes.
Twee mannen willen met elkaar trouwen. Mag dat in Nederland?
- A. Ja, dat mag
- B. Alleen in de kerk
- C. Nee, dat mag niet
Two men want to marry each other. The answer is A: yes, at the gemeente, like any other couple.
Wat gaat in Nederland voor: de wet of een religieuze regel?
- A. De wet
- B. De religieuze regel
- C. Dat bepaalt iedereen zelf
What comes first in the Netherlands: the law or a religious rule? The answer is A: the law.
Learn the key words in Dutch: gelijkheid (equality), vrijheid (freedom), discriminatie (discrimination), gewoonte (custom). Then try the KNM practice questions.
